Happy Easter!

"Who let the dogs out?"

Yeah, a few people complain about dogs on our local beaches. But this video shows one of the reasons I love living in Pismo Beach.

"C for Cookie"

Go ahead -- I dare ya!

Corporate capitalism explained

Voting and YOU!

Cthulhu for President!

Elder Gods have sweet tooths, too!

Posted here, you’ll find samples from H.P. Lovecraft’s brief, once-secret tenure as a Whitman’s Sampler copywriter. Here are two of my favorite selections:

Peanut Butter Cup

In 1856, a fisherman from a tiny hamlet on the New England coast made a terrible pact with serpentine beasts from beneath the sea, that he might create the most delicious sweet seen upon the Earth since the days of the great Elder Race. Thus was forged the satanic pact between peanut butter and chocolate that resulted in the mutant offspring you see before you!

Chocolate Cherry Cordial

You must not think me mad when I tell you what I found below the thin shell of chocolate used to disguise this bonbon’s true face. Yes! Hidden beneath its rich exterior is a hideously moist cherry cordial! What deranged architect could have engineered this non-Euclidean aberration? I dare not speculate.

2008 Summer Olympics coverage

The Beijing Olympics: Are They A Trap?

Saturday morning funnies

This is for Brian, who also has a problem with Christian Bale's "crushed-gravel, angry stage whisper."

Your Wednesday moment of political reality

I'll show you politics in America. Here it is, right here.

"I think the puppet on the right shares my beliefs."

"I think the puppet on the left is more to my liking."

"Hey, wait a minute, there's one guy holding out both puppets!"

-- Bill Hicks (1961-1994)

Advice for the embarrassed nonvoter

Today Now!: How To Pretend You Give A Shit About The Election

Summer gas prices

My pooch prefers Ray-Bans

The catalog actually says, "Doggles are protective eyewear for dogs. Unlike ordinary dog sunglasses, Doggles actually protect dog's eyes from foreign objects, wind, and UV light."

Unlike ordinary dog sunglasses? Sheesh. I love my doggie, but what's this world coming to?

When failed sci-fi TV pilots attack!

Space: 1899!

Larry David on Hillary's madness

“Here's an idea for an Obama ad: a montage of Clinton's Sybillish personalities that have surfaced during the campaign with a solemn voiceover at the end saying, ‘Does anyone want this nut answering the phone?’

“How is it that she became the one who's perceived as more equipped to answer that call than the unflappable Obama? He, with the ice in his veins, who doesn't panic when he's losing or get too giddy when he's winning, who's as comfortable in his own skin as she's uncomfortable in hers. There have been times in this campaign when she seemed so unhinged that I worried she'd actually kill herself if she lost. Every day, she reminds me more and more of Adele H., who also had an obsession that drove her insane. A few weeks ago, I started to feel sorry for her. Oh Christ, let her win already...Who cares...It's not worth it. There's not that much difference between them. She can have it. Anything to avoid watching her descend into madness. So I switched. I started rooting for her. It wasn't that hard. Compromise comes easy to me. I was on board.

“And then I saw the ad.

“I watched, transfixed, as she took the 3 a.m. call...and I was afraid...very afraid. Suddenly, I realized the last thing this country needs is that woman anywhere near a phone. I don't care if it's 3 a.m. or 10 p.m. or any other time. I don't want her talking to Putin, I don't want her talking to Kim Jong Il, I don't want her talking to my nephew. She needs a long rest. She needs to put on a sarong and some sun block and get away from things for a while, a nice beach somewhere — somewhere far away, where there are...no phones.”

Source: Huffington Post

1800 anti-Jefferson TV ad

Free Bill Stickers!

Thanks, Wendy!

Sunday morning funnies

Thanks, dirty harry. We're light years apart philosophically, but sometimes, you sure can be funny!