Saturday, May 14, 2005

What was great (and not-so-great) about "Star Trek"

For me, the only really great thing about the entire Star Trek franchise, which finally shut down last night on UPN, was this lady at the right. Major Kira Nerys (aka Nana Visitor) was a former Bajoran freedom fighter and had an undeniable, uh, appeal. Sure, she turned to the Dark Side and joined the goddamn Federation, but she maintained her rebel spirit throughout the entire Star Trek: Deep Space Nine series. She had spunk.

Bob Wallace posted an anonymous “Ten Things I Hate About Star Trek” today. The whole thing is funny and worth looking at. But here are my two favorite items from the list:

9. The Federation.

This organization creeps me out. A planet-wide government that runs everything, and that has abolished money. A veritable planetary DMV. Oh sure, it looks like a cool place when you’re rocketing around in a Federation Starship, but I wonder how the guy driving a Federation dump truck feels about it? ...

5. Rule by committee.

Here’s the difference between Star Trek and the best SF show on TV last year:

Star Trek:

Picard: “Arm photon torpedoes!”
Riker: “Captain! Are you sure that’s wise?”
Troi: “Captain! I’m picking up conflicting feelings about this! And it appears that you’re a ’fraidy cat.”
Wesley: “Captain, I’m just an annoying punk, but I thought I should say something.”
Worf: “Captain, can I push the button? This is giving me a big Klingon warrior chubby.”
Giordi: “Captain, I think we should reverse the polarity on them first.”
Picard: “I’m so confused. I’m going to go to my stateroom and look pensive.”


Captain: “Let’s shoot them.”
Crewman: “Are you sure that’s wise?”
Captain: “Do you know what the chain of command is? It’s the chain I’ll BEAT YOU WITH until you realize who’s in command.”
Crewman: “Aye Aye, sir!”


At 2:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

And I stole your picture of Shatner holding the cool phaser rifle. The one that didn't work on Gary Lockwood. Or was it the one that didn't work on the big-headed aliens? Hmm ... oh well.

At 3:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

If I had my choice, I'd say the heck with those phasers and just suck all the salt out of everyone. . .although now that I think about it, a salt vampire is pretty goofy.

Not Anonymous, just Bob Wallace, but too lazy to sign up.

At 3:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah but she was a babe - at least she was when McCoy was looking at her - not when she morphed back into the Swamp Thing. Yuck!

(YOU are king lazy!)

At 4:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

had a serious nana visitor jones for a while years ago, though not a big star trek fan. there are some pretty saucy pics out there of that bold TV candy. hope you're not going "conservative" on us.
; )


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